ThroatLand Security

I've decided that my hypochondria should have levels like the terror alerts the White House has. Green for everything's fine, I don't think I have a disease or terminal illness; Yellow for maybe have a cold coming or something bigger but nothing terminal or life threatening; Orange for not dying but something's bad; and Red for I have something terminal and awful and debilitating.

Right now I'm at red because I've decided I have throat cancer. Yes, there is a tumor in my throat and I'm probably dying from it. Hopefully soon I will go to the doctor (and they will probably tell me I'm crazy and I just have plaque buildup or something lame), but until then, I will continue to worry.